How many times have you come across a cute little girl with bows and ribbons and you wish she was your own? Or a cute little boy with his crew cut trying so hard to look adult? How many times do mothers tell their two year old Kids “Don’t do that!” “No that’s naughty!”
When it comes to food, how many times have you tried to feed your 2 or 3 year old child and all you hear is “No!”?
“Would you like some vegetables?”
“How about some broccoli?”
“No! I don’t like the smell!”
“Ok . Try some asparagus”
“Apara..what’s that? No, I don’t want”
But try ”How about some ice cream?”
You’ll hear “Yea! I want ice cream!”
And it goes on. However, when it comes to going out, all you hear is “Mummy (or daddy) can I come with you? I want to go with you!”
“No you can’t! I have a meeting. Stay home with grandma and she’ll give you some cookies.. Kiss mummy bye “kissing her goodbye is confirmation that you are leaving without her but she wants to go with you!
At this stage you develop (you have to!) some disappearing tricks that will take you to your car (you are late!) before the child realizes you are gone!
At that age too they shower you with kisses and shower your face with sweet loving kisses.
Then they grow up and become Teenagers. A crucial formative stage when you teach them the ground rules of life and what they can do or not do so as not to get into trouble! Apart from the Terrible Two stages, this is the most challenging for parents. This is when they think they know everything (they know a lot!) and try to outsmart you by
showing how clever they are!
They argue and say you are “old school” squirm when you try to kiss them goodbye in front of their friends!
If you are able to get them to be your friend at this stage, then you are genius and they’ll do well from listening to your “advice” as a friend, not a parent so Be Friends with them! Talk to them, not as a toddler but as an adult (they are in such a hurry to be adult and treated like one) so be the friend they can come home to and tell about the mean girl in school who beat on them or the cute girl everyone likes!
Then they become adults, probably have their own families. Now dear parents, this is the time TO LET GO AND TAKE THE BACK SEAT!
Time to be the true friend in bad times and good times. They will come to you and ask for your help when they need it. Anything else will be seen as interference and you’ll be told to mind your business!
They never remember (they choose to forget) those times you kissed their bruise better or made sure that the tooth fairy left them money for the tooth she took or that Santa Claus left them presents for being good (even when they were not!)
Now you don’t tell them what to do. You reason and plead with them to do the right thing (Mama knows best but don’t you Dare tell them that!)
If you have a friend in your child this is the stage you reap the rewards of your labors, when they buy you a new car or house or take you on that long promised trip to an exotic destination.
Enjoy! This is your time.